Have you recently come out as bisexual or lesbian? If so, the idea of asking a woman out can be especially nerve-wracking. How do you even know if they are interested in women? How do you come out to them? It can all feel extremely overwhelming but the right tips can help ease some of the anxiety.
Be Okay With Rejection
Sometimes the fear of rejection is so strong that it can completely stop you from asking in the first place. It may be easier said than done, but try to be willing to accept some rejection now and then.
It is normal to hear ‘no’ now and then. Don’t stress over it. If she says no, walk away with a smile and be proud of yourself for trying. By putting yourself out there, you grew your confidence, stepped out of your comfort zone, and got one step closer to finding the right girl for you. The more you ask, the better chance you have of finding a great partner.
Rules? What Rules?
Whatever your sexuality, try to avoid limiting yourself to the rules and expectations of society. Treat yourself with grace, be confident in yourself, and remember that you have nothing to lose by asking.
Pick The Right Place
If you want to automatically make the process easier on yourself, check out a gay or lesbian bar or a bisexual or lesbian social event. It’s an easy way to guarantee you’ll be around women that are interested in other women.
You can always give online dating a try as well. But remember, even if you aren’t at a specific gay or lesbian event, don’t shy away from asking out another woman.
Let Her Know You Are Interested
What is the easiest way to find out if another woman is a lesbian or bisexual? Try talking with her and asking simple but direct questions such as, “did you come with your boyfriend?”.
Even if she doesn’t let you know if she is interested in women, it is best to be upfront with her sooner than later. Get the conversation going, compliment her, and ask about her interests and hobbies.
If you feel a connection, wait for the right moment and let her know that you would love to see her again and that she caught your eye. If she flirts back and smiles, you may just find that the feeling is mutual.
Fake It If You Have To
While I don’t encourage faking in the bedroom, it is okay to fake your confidence when you are working up the courage to ask out another woman. Even if you feel nervous, try your best to feel and appear confident. This can go a long way in making you feel sexier and more magnetic.
Keep It Clear and Simple
Asking out another girl doesn’t need to be formal or overwhelming. Letting her know you are interested can be as simple as, “I’d love to see you again” or “Can I get your phone number??”. If she says no, remember that this just wasn’t the right time or right woman for you.
Take It Slow
Asking out another woman doesn’t need to happen in a rush. Many times, the best relationships begin as friendships. So if you want to take it slow and get to know her first to see if you have a potential connection, that is completely fine too!
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